Threading Through a Day of Mercy

Today started off a bit rocky—up at 4, then again at 5, and finally for good at 6. Not my usual rhythm, but maybe my body knew I needed the extra rest. I’m learning not to fight those shifts too hard.

Once I was up and dressed, I settled into my morning draw. I reached for my Memento Mori deck and pulled… lilies. Again. It’s the second time recently, and I think it’s trying to remind me to be gentle with myself. With my stomach unsettled and the start of the day feeling off, maybe mercy is exactly what I need to carry with me today.

mercy. chastity. a renewal. type of funeral flower. a moment of peace.

After that, it was time to tackle the schoolwork. I’ve got Lily her own folder and clipboard coming in from Walmart—hopefully that’ll make organizing everything a bit easier on me going forward. Aria had already filled a completed folder, so I sorted and tucked that one away, ready to head down to our storage room today. The rest of the folders got a good sorting, and once their clipboards were set up, everything found its place back in the cubby.

I’ll need to print Lily’s worksheets out as the day goes, but we’ll just see how far we get. Things always move a little slower on school days when Lily’s here, and honestly, that’s okay.

Today’s shape assignment is more of a motor skill challenge—they’re threading and “sewing” shapes. Cute in theory… but I’ve already broken three hole punches trying to set it up. So that’s how that’s going.

whole punch shapes

Next came checking in on my starter. I was genuinely happy to see that a good chunk of the discard jar had been used up yesterday—even if I ended up adding back in over half of what had been pulled out. At least it’s being cycled through.

I had already messaged for some help with the morning chores, since Charlie is still very much on bed rest. He will be until about three months after he’s been sewn back together. This wait for his ostomy reversal… it’s been the longest year of my life. We’re getting closer, but every day still feels like holding breath, like balancing everything with one hand while the other’s just waiting.

I fed the turtle, put on Pokémon for the girls, and got started on the dogs. I paused between them to make sure the girls had bowls of cereal in front of them—something quick, but filling. Not long after, Dameion was up and ready to take over. He stepped in to finish walking the dogs, feed the lamb, and begin working his way through the rest of the animals until it was time to circle back for the next round of dog walks and lamb feeding.

Meanwhile, the girls had already wrapped up breakfast, gotten dressed, cleaned their room, and dove into their schoolwork. And me? I finished the hole punching—finally—without breaking another one. Small wins.

completed hole punch cards

After breakfast, the day continued at a crawl. The girls were extra cranky—running on what I think is their third night in a row of low sleep. Still, I managed to finally finish those horrible lace cards. A small miracle, honestly.

The girls got some fresh air inspiration and drew pictures of things we’d found outside. After that, they made it through at least half of the lace cards before sitting down for a lunch of mac and cheese and then heading off to nap.

Dameion had caught up on my slack with the animals—finished off the morning chores and opened the stand. Charlie, meanwhile, was busy at the table, laminating what seemed like a neverending pile of papers. The hum of the machine became the background noise of our midday.

During nap, I got the dogs out for their afternoon walk, then helped Charlie start cutting through the laminating pile—turning those sheets into flashcards and games while juggling dishes, laundry, and a bit of cleaning in between. All the while, I kept circling back to this morning’s tarot draw. Lilies. Mercy.

And now, I see it clearly.

Every one of the girls had something going on this morning—extra cranky, extra sensitive. Charlie’s been short-tempered, Franklin had a rough day at work, and I’ve been moving through the day like I’m wading through molasses. Slow. Heavy.

So yes… today was a call for mercy. Not just for them—but for myself, too.

After nap, we circled back to the lace-up cards—again. This time with a snack of the mixed fruit I canned a couple months back. Charlie and Dameion had gone up the mountain to get water, so things were quiet for a bit. Franklin sat calmly on the floor with the girls, watching them work through their lacing, while I kept chipping away at cleaning—mentally drained from the day but still moving.

We made it through a long list: the rest of the lace-ups, their two math tables (both addition and subtraction), our sea shell flashcards, shape flashcards, summer flashcards, and even managed to build a cube before dinner rolled around.

Dinner, by the way, was cereal. Kindly requested. I didn’t argue.

After the girls went to bed, I cut out their shape sort for the next day and started tidying up—cleaning the kitchen, doing dishes, and trying to reset the house just enough to start again tomorrow. The dogs went out for their final walk of the night, and Charlie cooked up dinner while I wrapped up the last of my chores.

I was more than ready for bed.